How can I make this better?

To improve it, it would be a good idea to add in some more description and more imagery to bring the scene alive. Its good to replace words like said with more interesting synonyms such as declared, or hissed or remarked. You could also comment on what his movements are like. For example instead of getting closer, he could have crept closer. Jess could curl her blonde hair nervously. The page is very good though.